Morning Devotionals
by Don Emmitte
 
February 19th, 2008

 

“Be the Parent (Part 5)”
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Thorns and snares are in the way of the obstinate and willful; he who guards himself will be far from them. Train up a child in the way he should go [and in keeping with his individual gift or bent], and when he is old he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:5-6 Amplified Bible).

 

The fourth step is to develop a plan. In a perfect world, your parents gave you a good supply of parenting tools to use with your own children. Maybe your spouse's parents did the same. It is possible that you both feel well equipped. After all, look at how delightful you two turned out! However, even if both of you had positive, confident, proactive parents, you bring different biases and routines into your new family. I'm guessing that your two families of origin, the families where you and your spouse were raised, did some things differently.

 

Are you aware of the definition of "normal"? It is whatever YOUR family did. You and your spouse bring two different "normals" that will contribute to the creation of the new "normal" for your family unit. Furthermore, your parents did not raise this child of yours... this unique individual who God has given you. All that is to say that whether or not the parenting you and your spouse received was superlative, you still need to be proactive and have a plan to help your child develop into a responsible adult with well-placed priorities. Let me make a few suggestions:

 

1.      First and foremost, give your child every opportunity to know Jesus. You should be intentional in seeing that the child in your home develops a relationship with Christ. No parent can make a child accept Christ as his or her Savior. There are, however, certain things a parent can do that can encourage that personal decision. Your commitment to Christ is of utmost importance. Your child is watching you and listening too. Even when your child is young, he will be deciding if you are the "real deal". This shouldn't panic you, and this is not a call to perfection. It is a reflection of the attitude of your heart.  Also, be sure to find a church where the Gospel is preached, children are loved, and Christian growth is encouraged. Then joyfully engage in opportunities to serve as individuals and as a family.

 

2.      Second, teach your child to obey. Teaching your child to obey you and helping him realize there are consequences for disobedience are two things that are essential. They should understand that boundaries are important. God gives us boundaries, not to fence us in, but to protect us from the dangers outside. Your responsibility as the parent is to determine and reinforce those boundaries. This is not being cruel, arbitrary, or hyper-demanding. It is being Biblical, knowing that with obedience comes freedom. If you make a commitment to these two objectives, to giving your child the opportunity to know Jesus and to teaching him to obey, you will be well on your way to success as a parent.